I can think back to a thousand different moments when the earth was tilted perfectly on it’s axis and my world was indeed perfect. The day I landed in Austria, the adventure spread out in front of me, the day someone put a camera in my hand, the day I met my best friend and husband, the day he told me he loved me, the day he married me, and the day that we held our children for the first time. Those are moments that have been branded in my heart for a lifetime, there are more of course but for the purpose of this Blog I will simply mention those.
I want to tell you about this man I married, this guy that God so lovingly placed in my path. He is smart, he is sweet, he is quick to admit his fault and apologize, he is generous and loyal, he is strong and protective, he is an amazing Father and wonderful provider. I couldn’t have chosen a better guy for me if I had spent my entire life searching. He was made for me, and in my heart of hearts I know that God moved us to each other’s path, because separately we were headed in different directions. I had a plan for more adventure overseas and Tim’s path was keeping him in Toronto.
Tim was born in the UK, I was born in the US, yet we found each other in Canada, if we had met in school we wouldn’t have meshed, Tim being a rule follower and very smart, me always skirting the edges of conformity that teachers don’t understand but could all be placed under the title ‘artistic child, teach differently’. I was rebellious, Tim confident in his place, I was angry, Tim was at ease. He would have thought me too wild and I would have thought him to straight. Then life taught us both some lessons, I learned that peace is better than anger, that some rules are there to protect you and that you can get hurt by rebellious choices, Tim got in touch with an angry rebellious side that allowed him to understand that side of people. Even though we didn’t know each other; God was preparing us for each other. So that, on the day we met there was a peace to our connection, there was a knowledge, that his person, this man, is the one that I have been waiting for. This is the one that I was trying to make previous boyfriends into. This is THE ONE. It wasn’t long before we were married, from first date to wedding day it was just a few days past nine months, and yet on that day I knew without doubt or questions that I was in the perfect place for me, I was on the path that I was made to be on.
Through out the journey that we have embarked Tim has stood strong beside me, standing in front of me and bracing us from the winds when they come and holding the umbrella when the rains threaten to drown us both. He has offerered a warm embrace and quiet restful place to hide, he is so much more to me today than the day I first said ‘I do”, I love him more than I dreamed even possible. There is no one on earth that I would have wanted to walk this road of life with. No one who could have been a better Father or Husband to the boys and I. We are perfectly suited. Laughing can be hard sometimes, life gets hard and the storms threaten to devour you, but with Tim we are finding ways to bring laughter back to our lives, and the lives of our kids. I watch him playing with the kids, wrestling and chasing them, and I smile because I know that there are going to be hard times ahead but if we can weather these last few years and find fun and laughter on the other side then there is hope for tomorrow, and with God as our guide I know that the love will only grow stronger, deeper and more fulfilling as time goes on.
In a sense this is a love letter to Tim, a testament to what I feel for him, who he is as a person but also who he is to me. He’s someone I respect to no end, someone who is self aware and can say I am sorry without qualms, someone who doesn’t allow the sun to set on anger, someone who makes coffee every morning just because he knows I like it, he is someone who will work tirelessly at work all day and come home and work tirelessly here, making our home safe and beautiful. He is someone who watches the kids when I go to the gym and then when I get home I find the house clean as well. He is someone who sacrifices for us, so that we can have something that we want or need, putting his own desires aside. This man that I married has faults, we all do, but he is willing to hear me when I point out his flaws and he listens without being defensive (something I am not very good at). He is someone who is self aware enough to know when he has hurt me, and comes to me, most of the time before I even need to say anything. He is kind, he is strong, he is a hard worker and confidant, and the best part is…? He loves me, and every morning he wakes up and chooses to continue loving me, regardless of my grumpiness, regardless of my failings as a wife or mother, my sensitive side that allows hurt to be burried and linger, regardless of the anger and frustrations of dealing with a sick child, or finding myself struggling for the last year. This man, in spite of myself, chooses to go on loving me, to go on holding me close and offering himself fully and compeletly regardless. How I came to know this man, to be loved by this man is truly a gift, one that I have at times been known to take for granted, but one that when I lay my head on the pillow at night to rest I thank God for.